Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Still Here, Still Standing

It's been a while since I posted. Obvious to those that follow me yes but for my readers that don't really know me outside of this blog and have been checking back and seeing nothing new I offer this post as an explanation. But first I would like to thank you for your patience. If you are of this group and haven't joined us on Facebook I'd like to take this moment to invite you and anyone else this blog blesses to join us there. The next time you're on Facebook won't you head on over the TheHolleringStump.com's page and "Like It" to join?! Where every one's invited to post any thing motivational, scriptural, constitutional, clean comical and/or U.S. military friendly! And welcome to leave your opinions/encouragements on the posts! And! Where you'll find some wonderful, God loving folks you can make prayer requests to. Just click on Rocky (that smilin' raccoon!) and he'll take ya there. If you're not on Facebook TheHolleringStump.com is on Twitter too. Other profiles I have can be found at the bottom left of each page in the form of badges. But just so ya know... I do use Facebook the most. At this time anyways! It's even been therapeutic for me this last few months.


I've been having a hard time focusing on any subject. At first I was determined I wasn't going to publish anything concerning this, but now it seems if I don't get this off my chest to my faithful readers I'm stuck. I have no inspiration. It's not flowing for me. I've started a coupl'a stories but just can't get into it. Realizing God gave Joshua 40 days to grieve for the death of Moses, I took that as a goal (this time) to be finished grieving the death of my first born. Who was living with me at the time. I'm not going into details but she is gone. At 26 far too young for this beautiful woman to be gone from this existence. An existence that blessed everyone that came into contact with her. For the most part I achieved my goal having had a string of 5 or 6 good days before the end of the 40 days, which was May 17. My head's back into work, I've adjusted to living alone, I'm laughing again and diggin' the tunes. The pain of the loss of my daughter still wells up at times but the intensity and duration is far from being unbearable. On the physical side, I'm a Marine. I'm a grunt. I can take the pain. On the spiritual side I am so thankful for the truth of God's Word. That I can take comfort in such a potentially devastating situation. Comfort in the words he gives me concerning physical death which ironically enough, was addressed on this blog just two posts ago in Death Can Really Suck The Life Out Of You. Which also memorializes my son... who died 3 years ago last March. 


So... Please allow me let me to tell you a little bit about my daughter. Alicia was born December 11 in mid Michigan. Exactly 2 weeks before Christmas. Her brother came two years and one week later. (I guess it took us three tries to figure out how to have a baby in the spring! Which did occur with my baby daughter.) Alicia and David formed a very tight bond growing up together that was beautiful to observe. Alicia always loved the outdoors and the life forms found out there. Always a big heart for animals. She nursed a box turtle with a cracked underbelly back to health here last summer. She would catch tadpoles in the stream at the bottom of this hill and put them in a small pond she made for them in our "back yard" to watch them develop. She left me with a kitten she "rescued" last January from a mom that was rejecting her. And two aquariums. She did hold a diploma from The School Of Animal Science for Professional Animal Care Specialist. She was also doing good in college which she really had to fight for. But she dropped out a year after her brother died not being able to recover the credits she lost after his death. 'lish (as I called her) was very intelligent and artistic in her writings. A trait I like to think she got from her daddy! A beautiful womanchild. With a beautiful heart. That I looked forward to meeting since I was 15 years old. Now asleep until the return of the Lord Jesus Christ. I so look forward to that day that I may see my daughter and son again!


Alicia loved music. Seen her dancing in her mama's belly at 8 months when we were at a battle of the bands. She loved the music her brother played. Some form of metal. My girl turned me onto quite a few bands I like. She was a Twilight fan, loved Family Guy and we shared a love of astronomy. We did observe the Jupiter, Venus, Moon conjunctions last March together a couple of times. We also learned together what a moondoggy was last February. I was blessed to be her and her brother's Little League manager the two years they played before we moved from Michigan to Tennessee. She took an interest in tennis and competition swimming in her early teen years. I have her 3 swimming trophies above my desk and found her and my old tennis rackets in the trunk of her car. She had a couple of boyfriends that were good for her. That ones that weren't got a taste of what I termed her "terror-texting" when she had had enough of their... immaturity (shall we call it?!) Her best friend at work told me whenever I came up in their conversations, which was often, she could definitely tell that Alicia loved her daddy. Which blesses me to no end! Love that girl! Miss her too. Her sister and I have talked about setting up a Facebook page for her siblings. To have a page where their friends can visit at times for remembrance. Maybe I'll post a link to it here when we get it up.


There! Done! There's been so much going on out there, quite a few things I'd like to share with you but like I said, I haven't been able to focus as far as writing goes. I've been helping a few others I know come to a deeper spiritual awareness and that's always therapeutic for me too. Almost 30 years of helping others see the spiritual side of life through God's Word and it still doesn't get old seeing them light bulbs goin' off in folks' heads! On the contrary! It brings great joy to my life! It seems to be a good barometer ya know? If you can still give when it seems you can't take anymore well... apparently you're not beaten into submission yet! And I'll be damned if situations and circumstances will break me down! I got news for them devils that continually drive theft, death and destruction in this realm. You may have gotten some major hits on me and mine in my life but I ain't down. I ain't done. And I'm coming... For you! Ya sons a'bitches!


Oops! Sorry! Sometimes ya gotta excuse my jarhead mentality!


                  Alicia's Favorite Toon                                       One Of Her Favorite Songs

      






1 comment:

Dave said...

btw... Alicia loved the name of this blog, and the raccoon. Of course!